its true

yulp, its true, its like 4.42, and i am finally up, 4.42am, in the mornin.

i did a very silly mistake in accounts paper, the 1st paper, and i tot i could scored. looks like it was another let down. of cos i am sad, i am not that kinda freakin ppl who go like, ITs OVER!!! s..GET REAL... too bad, tats not me, i am kinda...i dono how to describe it. ish

so...here i am, up and studying, fighting on. i just hate let downs, and i really don wanna see them comin. 'but the always do'....

i done with it...and i am still fighting....wonder y..@@

guess tats life when...u're stuck! ~~~

2 more hours

another 2 more hours and i will be able to determined my faith in accounts. this is the last accounts paper for the whole of my degree course and i am looking so forward to get it over and done with it.

yes...yes..call me an accountant..but, so wat? don mean i must love accounts so much i cant live without it kay....@@

i bet its just life, we see things in a very positive way do we? accounts, here i come and this time, is the last chance to see if i really, can take wat accountants do for a living. conso..muacks!

manners

wats manners? anybody? wats being polite?

some ppl just wont be. some just take things for granted. they think that when others are doin it, its also for them. which, of cos...sometimes, ppl have no choice out of, manners.
whoever, what do these ppl get in return? nothing.

how could some one, who just eats out of others pockets, and not return anything in favor? me and lilian, we both buy things bac to eat and share, cook for each other. and she? she just think of herself. no one but HERSELF. yulks. worst kinda attitude cases.

she cooks for her own, and never ever cooks for us, mayb cos she dono how to. and, when others cook, it includes hers. omg..i cant believe there is such a person in town. no family up bringing at all! and, i am her fren. wat a disgrace!

i feel so ashame to be part of her life, and she, being part of me...is even worse. lets up a stop shall we? hehe....things will turn better. no cheap skat ppl in my life, around me...making use of me...and taking things from me just cos they are POOR..shame on them.

conspiracy...deal!

yes, of cos, when we have made up our minds tat something wont work out right, it will never work out right. but....but...sometimes, its not up to us to say. ppl who hav great experience and know wats goin round the world will tell u, it does not always go UR way. yulp...its always very true.

the earth is not turning because of u, its turning as it always have been. it is not around u, its around our big sun. hasn't it seem like common sense to u?

yea..accept wats goin on is not too bad izit? or..listening wat others have to say would be a much better idea, rather than goin all out on something tat, 90% think wont turn out right. or rather, ppl think it wont turn out right.

over ambitious. yulp, how many times has it seem tat it has lead u to a dead end? cant u learn from mistakes? sometimes, its not tat u are incapable of, or others are not willing to help out, but, its just how things are meant to be! remember, its not U tat the world is goin round and round for. its nature.

again and again, u bang the wall urself. hit high and make a low turn bac, by telling how much work others should have put in at the beginning. go all out without listening, and u will say, u never told me so! well, how many times would u wanna bang the wall and make ur face flat? a flat tire wont go far. so would a face.

ppl around u. yes....there are all kinds of ppl, good bad, tall thin, fat short, smart stupid...u name it. all types. but, choose who to listen, and ur left and right man well, or u will end up, looking at urself in the mirror with nothing by ur side. they said that...Cesar was a man with high dignity and chose his right man well, but, the right,man fell in love with wat we call...woman. lush! yes...so all went wrong again. is it just a lush? or do u really find him sensible and ur type of guy? he loves u? or cos u are pretty and outspoken and stupid?

be choosy, yes...always. chose the best idea that comes from ur ppl, not others. thats wat the kings always do. never never listen blindly. chose them well. as well as to lead a whole troupe of ppl.

is tat hard to do?

i don think so. its wat we call: COMMON SENSE.
darling girl, u should know better.

hair lossssss

oh great, just when things are getting a little busy busy busy, my hair starts falling like mad. i dono.....just cos yesterday i was too lazy to wash my hair, tons of them fell down like its snowing..zzz..pengsan!!
well, its bothering me, of cos it does!! i am a girl k!! and hair is a very essential part of my body! ~~ my dad told me to cut short and see, mayb due to stress also. tomorrow i will wash my hair again and see if the amount is amazing once more. aih....sad case!

wat a life, god...with aap comin on wed, i am freaking out already. and this is making me even more scared of everything tats goin to happen. and, one more thing is that, everytime i eat outside food, my tummy, my whole body feels like...its not there. feels cold, tired and very very jellified. zzz...
oh my...wats goin on?? i have been eating the same food for the past 2 yrs in this place, nothing went wrong.

and nightmares...oh god....cant i have a night of peace? i need to slp.....
i seldom have any in the past, and i keep having them now! even an afternoon nap makes me even more tired, cos in my dreams, god knows wat i am doin. zzz

haiz...life. my life...wat a life.....##

sad

oh well, things are not that good lately. hope it will turn out better than it is now when finals are all over. haiz

y? y things go bad? y cant they just be the same? its not the same anymore u know? u dont? i feel so k, and its really not the same anymore. mayb to me, but not to u yet.

u dont feel so? or am i a little emotional these days? a little too tired? a little too..uncertain?

its not that we have not met longer than this b4, but....i feel different. u are different. u keep telling me things are the same, and nothing has changed. but...are u really sure? i don think so and its not the same. i know. i can feel it in my bones.

y?? y things change??

thanks

sometimes...after a long sem of working hard and continuously over the same thing...finally thins have to settle down. even for just awhile..a moment..its worth all the effort.

this whole sem, we have been working on the thesis...giving up almost everything tat we could do just to get it done with. and after all the prob we hav gone through..all the scolding and humiliating.. things are better and comin to the end of the bumpy road. its a little smooth now..just tat...we don know how long more it will remain like tat.

just came bac from pd for the weekend..and it was tiring. we still are..but..not stopping at all. more things will be comin up sooner or later. just a matter of time. after this week...its a whole week of our study week. to prepare for the finals...mad!!@@
then...the sem break. oh my..thats the worst i guess. a whole stretch of work. gotta do the listing..plus our questionnaire...with the rest of them...and prepare for the article submission. thats the climax of the day.
after all these..the new sem starts. it starts but...it has never ended for us. so..there wont be any start!!

next...will have our sem again...short one this time..with the continuing of the thesis work..and the conference. madness..!!

anyways...i really did learn. learn lots. and learn to be myself. not to care how others think and wanna bother. its really something tat we gotta be truthful with. if we dont know..ask! tats the best. not just sit and wait. aih...

however..things are always lighter or rather brighter when u see the color of the other. its always like tat. we get to know ppl more when we spend time with them. for my group..it seems tat amanda is getting on track. and..i am very happy..she is more..into the conversation now..and..we're all happy!! its like a big big family!! hehe