我知道

我知道，你一定会有很多考验，而我只能在这里默默地等你回来，你不知道这样有多痛苦，但，我也只希望你可以加油，一定要加油。
虽然，现在的我，不想说话，也没心情做任何事情，但，我知道你一定有自己的苦衷。
我也应该为你加油，但，我姓你不会了解我现在的心情。

你跟我讲故事，是要我开心还是要我明白你现在的苦衷？
我明白你的故事是要给我个小小的劝告，但，忠言逆耳，你不知道吗？

我们很久没见面，你知道我有多么期待考试的结束吗？但你又跟我说你要开刀，没那么快来。我痛在心，应为。。我们到底什么时候才能见面？

你叫我不要哭，因为眼泪是宝，是金。但你一字在让我哭。。。我又能择么办？你要我怎么做？
你知道我有多想你吗？你知道这样有多痛苦吗？

你常常问我有没有支持你，我肯定有啦！我为什么不会呢？你知我的宝，你知道吗？
我会坚强，你放心。

mother's day

when a person is having trouble, the 1st place they will think about is home. home is where the heart is.
no matter how far away u are from home, when things go bad, hehe..its home u wanna run to. well, some times, tats really very true. when i am in deep shit, i wanna go home.
i never felt like this till i realized how much importance my family members meant to me. i realized that my mummy depends so much on me to help her make things easier in the house, and my dad too, when he is so busy. well, i just wanna go bac and do what ever i can to just help them out and make things easier for them.

when they get older, we will see tat, they are getting more and more cuter, and having all sorts of thinking. hee..some that might even make u laugh. although it might be stupid, and irritating to them. its a different thing to me.

this year, its my 1st time not being able to celebrate mother's day with my family and..some how, its rather sad. i really do feel tat, its a pity i cant. my cousins are all bac in jb and tonight they are having dinner at some restaurant. the food there is great..hehe..but, tats just part of the whole thingy. the main thing is to be with all of them, celebrating this day.

mummy can be naggy at times, but still, i find tat more funnier than ever. last time...its a different story though..hehe..now, things are much better, and the only thing is that i am not small anymore. keke...cant really manja her like last time, although i still do..all the time.

happy mother's day. from a far far daughter, although only in kl.

day 1

a terrible start it was, but, yet...kinda interesting for all of us. with all the experience and all, haiz..tiring tiring tiring. tats all i can say. all work and nothing else, i just don und how to get it goin. well...things will be much better sooner or later. hehe..

if only things are much smoother, then life would be much easier. i dono...its like, stuck in between, and not getting anywhere, wonder wat are we actually goin towards. haiz.

ever felt like, its when u are needed only then u will be appreciated? well...tats it la. the feeling is so so so real. too bad, we don have a choice do we? zzz...

i hate it when we cant get things moving anywhere. all will be just stuck there and nothing will be moving at all. tats life. nothing more but, crap. but, everytime, i dono y its like, i am wrong all the time. no one else is, only me. and me. its just time to accept tat things are just meant to be like tat. and, i cant even complain. i say anything, or give any remark. nothing. just shut up. well, normal la.
but, wat can i do? just gotta accept things the way it is. one day, i will be stronger, stronger than ever. and i wont cry for stupid things like tat, i wont be down or angry. i wont have any feelings towards this kinda things and i wont have to be emo. all of these nonsense will just puff! turn to dust. i guess when tat day comes, my life would be much more happier, cos, u will be happier too! hee...and when u are, i will be too. tats the whole thing about.

yulp, we made a deal, u dont like it, u don call it a deal, but, i do. cos, its something tat i gotta change my attitude towards and make a whole lot of difference. see, u see it at 2 different angles, and, things would be much easier for both of us. u will see. hee

but, for the time being, i cant help being disappointed with all of this crap comin into my life. like u said, i should be more understanding and all, well, i will. no worries.

one law paper down

well...its one paper down...law. hehe...good news. but..bad day.
anyways...donkey...go for it ya...i will miss u lots though...keke

sad

feeling so down today. i am not sure also..
actually, when donkey sees this, he's gonna be kinda sad. cos, i am down because of him. not cos of anything else. well, i also dono how to tell him, its his finals. i don want him to get upset and worried. so..just keep inside me. mayb i might recover asap.

mayb its really true tat everything i say might not play an important place, but even if it doesn't, y bother asking for my opinion? i really don get it. everytime is like tat. the same thing happens again and again. its really very very...bad of him to keep on doin this. but, i don wanna spoil his feelings. later he might not be able to do well. tats the most important thing. no matter wat that comes, i will never let him worry during his final period. he needs to concentrate..and...hehe..i will support him.

baby always supports me whenever i am having a hard time. and he also makes my life so much better during finals. thats the period when i really cant so without him. so..i know he also needs the same thing. well, tats wat i can give him...when he needs it most. hee..mental support. lalala.

but, i cant hide the feelings inside. i just cant help it! i dono how to anyways... i wanna hide it from him, so tat it wont bother him. but, he always knows.

and, it was extra sadding when he told me he could not come down on the 7th. i tot he could. forgot that he will be working. tats the climax for the day la. it was so killing. well, i guess tats wat made me really down today. i miss him. i really do, and i cant help feeling sad. i know i gotta und tat he gotta work. but, y must i always be so understanding? can i not for once?
no...i cant of cos..duh?!?! but, i really hate it.
i wonder will it be like the past. history wont repeat right? i know it wont. this time it wont. i know i love him and i need him so much. and...he needs me too!! keke..perfect match.

haiz...but, i don wanna und!!! cant i be demanding?
i wanna be for once. sometimes, it makes girls feel how important they are. at times la. just by being selfish and childish, they get it.

well....zzz la..

the time of the yr

when ppl are goin through a lot, they wanna find ways to get out. and, i wanna find my way to get out too! tats not hard right? i don think so...

but, sometimes, things don go the way u want it to be. normal la! and...u just gotta adapt to it. all sorts of circumstances, making our lives...unsmooth. yet, no choice.

donkey is studying madly. his finals are comin very soon. my sister also. next week!! hee..mine is still kinda far, but, far is also very very near. comin soon! in 2 weeks time. o...tats the time la!
donkey just gave me some encouragement this afternoon. i wanna do it this time too. and, i know, if i work harder, i can. i just need to get i little more. not to say very little also though...but, just tat few more points to get at least 3.0. then, i will be save. for the time being of cos.

well, this sem, i wanna get my desired target, and i am quite sure, i can make it if i start now consistently. must follow my diary very very strictly. no more playing around! hehe...

tats for the time being la..and...i know donkey will always be behind me supporting me..all the while. hee...sweeto baby!

after all these, then thesis. after thesis, we are meeting again!!! hee..cant wait o..tats the time of my life. out lives!!

i am so so so sorry

oh dear, i made donkey sad and angry again..i really din mean it..but, haiz..

everytime he calls me, i wont be able to pick up the stupid hp. i also dono y. its like, every time he calls right, i will be away from my hp. y a? zzz...guess i am really very very irresponsible. haiz..

y izit that always is me? i always makes him sad, disappointed and very very worried. but, i can never make it up for him, nno matter wat i do, and, he will still always forgive me.
guess, i make promises without doin them either. haiz...

how leh? dull mode now. zzz
guess i will have little mood to do watever i am suppose to do.
donkey is having his finals soon, and its my responsibility to make sure he is ok..happy, and not bored of studyin. but, i go and make his life more complicated by adding all these..ah!!! wat to do leh? any how also...zzz..i dono la...

but, i am really very very sorry. haiz
terrible girl friend
tong tong tong...~~